I was sitting on the couch the other day with Josh, scratching his back.

“You have soft skin.”

“I know.”

“Do I have soft skin?”

(feels my arm.) “No, your skin is very rough.”

“What can I do about it?”

“Do what I do–take a lot of baths. I take, uh, . . . 3 baths a week. But DON’T use shampo0.”

“If I don’t use shampoo, what should I use?”

“Water and toys–that works for me.”

Hmm, that explains the ring around the tub. My theory is that the layer of dirt on him has an SPF rating of 100, which protects him from harmful UV damage. So I guess the motto is “bathe less, live longer.”